finding the good after loss

the blog

July 21, 2017

There is even grief in paradise

Posted in: Good Grievings

Guest blog post from my cousin, Ryan Biddulph.

3 Benefits of Grieving

Grieving can be a sucky process.

But sitting with your fearful, lower-energy feelings is beneficial.


I have seen – and experienced – 3 distinct benefits of grieving.

First off, a little backstory.

Many folks know me as the Blogging From Paradise guy. Smiling. Clowning. Island hopping. The “always happy” guy.

But even though I have shared my struggles, few folks know that like any human being, I have experienced some dark days and had to grieve my way through these circumstances.

My mom is currently in hospice after a 5 year bout with Alzheimmer’s. Even though she is still in her mortal coil I had to grieve the loss of her personality, her energy, her memory and virtually every aspect of her existence over the past half decade, and as she has regressed in hospice, she has all but lost her body too.

This process is not particularly pleasant at times. Crying, screaming, punching pillows, or sometimes, feeling out depressive, powerful feelings is like receiving an colonoscopy from a doctor who prefers using a spiked mace to get the job done.

But on the other side of your grieving lies blessed healing. One grieving session at a time.

As my cousin Tom says, there really can be good grievings.

Let’s look at 3 benefits of grieving.

1: Dissolving Depression

Grieving helped me dissolve depression.

I went through a few stages in my life of a fairly deep, dark depression. Staying in bed for weeks. Suicidal thoughts. A general malaise, like a big old black cloud over my head, following me around.

Grieving – through crying, or yellowing, or sobbing, or just being with my lower energy feelings, until said feelings passed – helped me dissolve the predominant, yolk-like feeling of depression.

If you feel debilitated by depression, take a deep breath. Relax just a little bit. Begin to slowly grieve whatever loss you feel.

Although you probably want to speak to a licensed specialist if you feel lost in a dark, depressive abyss this simple practice of being with your grief can begin to dissolve your depressive feelings.

2: Improves Your Physical Health

Grieving properly improved my physical health immensely.

I had always been a workout nut. But grieving helped me clear out some lower energies that needed clearing so I could workout and rest from a higher energy space.

Grief is like an energetic yolk. If you release the yolk by feeling the loss of what you grieve you will energize yourself for your workouts, whether you are walking, jogging, running or hitting the gym.

Don’t fool yourself; you can’t outrun your grief, no matter how much you try to outrun it by working out like a beast. You can’t get over what’s still in you. Meaning, it’s OK to workout to dissolve stress or to burn off some lower energy steam but you need to get to the core of your grief, by feeling it, to clear it out and to reap the physical benefits of embracing and releasing your grief.

3: Grief Is A Gift To Share With The World

Tom teaches you that grief is a gift to share with the world, to show you that you can still live your dreams even if you have suffered devastating losses.

So many individuals who may have not lost loved ones to death are still grieving other things or people in their lives. You can literally grieve over anything, or anyone.

Knowing this, sharing your good grievings, and how you are learning to process and release these energies will inspire other folks to feel their grief.

Being a world traveler, we do a terrible job in the Western world with grieving. Many people in Eastern or African cultures refer to Westerners as the Walking Dead. And I ain’t talking about the TV show.

We are slowly learning *not* to walk around in a grief-induced, depressive, lower-energy state. We are learning that healing can occur from the inside-out when you let loose, relax, and are present with your feelings. We are leanring that true power and strength is had in feeling pain, crying out fears or just being present with a super shitty day, versus seeking distractions or resisting these feelings in some way, shape or form.

Feeling your grief and sharing your stories with the world gives other Westerners and folks from all over the globe permission to feel their pain and fears, so they, too can be the beneficiaries of good grievings.

Your Turn

Are you feeling your grief?

What benefits of grieving have you experienced?

About the Author

Ryan Biddulph is a blogger, author and world traveler who’s been featured on Richard Branson’s Virgin Blog, Forbes, Fox News, Entrepreneur, Positively Positive, Life Hack, John Chow Dot Com and Neil Patel Dot Com. He has written and self-published 126 bite-sized eBooks on Amazon. Ryan can help you build a successful blog at Blogging From Paradise.

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