Post from the beach

As I sit here chillaxin (chillin and relaxin) 😬. I was thinking about how happy I am with my life right now.  Starting this blog as made me realize that I don’t need the therapy I  was always in need of.  I always told my counselor that I spoke with that I didn’t want to be in therapy for the rest of my life.  I found my out, The blog is my out.  In the beginning it was tough. All the feeling resurfacing and sad memories. It did change my mood, this is one of the reasons why I took my break from posting.

Of course I have my days like anyone else does, but I am truly happy with my life. I love where we live now and I am such a proud father to my 2 beautiful girls and my best friend and wife are always on the same page. My cousin the bloggingfromparadise.com guy continues to keep pushing to post what I feel and don’t worry about anything else. So here I am on the beach with my family and her friend who is visiting us writing to you to say continue living your life. Your loved ones would not want it any other way. Continue remembering them they way you are. Remember the happy times you had with them.  If you are having a tough time right now please take a look back at my recent posts to see what I went through in the past years, and you ll see how I got where I am.

I want to thank all of you that read my blog. Weather it is just one post or all of them.  It means the world to me to know that I’m getting the word out there. Continue keeping those happy memories with you all the time and know that your loved ones are always with you everyday.  My mom is by my side 99 percent of the time. Trust me 😉😬. Until next time live laugh love
Cheers,

Tom 

There is even grief in paradise

3 Benefits of Grieving 

Grieving can be a sucky process.

 

But sitting with your fearful, lower-energy feelings is beneficial.

 

Really.

 

I have seen – and experienced – 3 distinct benefits of grieving.

 

First off, a little backstory.

 

Many folks know me as the Blogging From Paradise guy. Smiling. Clowning. Island hopping. The “always happy” guy.

 

But even though I have shared my struggles, few folks know that like any human being, I have experienced some dark days and had to grieve my way through these circumstances.

 

My mom is currently in hospice after a 5 year bout with Alzheimmer’s. Even though she is still in her mortal coil I had to grieve the loss of her personality, her energy, her memory and virtually every aspect of her existence over the past half decade, and as she has regressed in hospice, she has all but lost her body too.

 

This process is not particularly pleasant at times. Crying, screaming, punching pillows, or sometimes, feeling out depressive, powerful feelings is like receiving an colonoscopy from a doctor who prefers using a spiked mace to get the job done.

 

But on the other side of your grieving lies blessed healing. One grieving session at a time.

 

As my cousin Tom says, there really can be good grievings.

 

Let’s look at 3 benefits of grieving.

 

1: Dissolving Depression

 

Grieving helped me dissolve depression.

 

I went through a few stages in my life of a fairly deep, dark depression. Staying in bed for weeks. Suicidal thoughts. A general malaise, like a big old black cloud over my head, following me around.

 

Grieving – through crying, or yellowing, or sobbing, or just being with my lower energy feelings, until said feelings passed – helped me dissolve the predominant, yolk-like feeling of depression.

 

If you feel debilitated by depression, take a deep breath. Relax just a little bit. Begin to slowly grieve whatever loss you feel.

 

Although you probably want to speak to a licensed specialist if you feel lost in a dark, depressive abyss this simple practice of being with your grief can begin to dissolve your depressive feelings.

 

2: Improves Your Physical Health

 

Grieving properly improved my physical health immensely.

 

I had always been a workout nut. But grieving helped me clear out some lower energies that needed clearing so I could workout and rest from a higher energy space.

 

Grief is like an energetic yolk. If you release the yolk by feeling the loss of what you grieve you will energize yourself for your workouts, whether you are walking, jogging, running or hitting the gym.

 

Don’t fool yourself; you can’t outrun your grief, no matter how much you try to outrun it by working out like a beast. You can’t get over what’s still in you. Meaning, it’s OK to workout to dissolve stress or to burn off some lower energy steam but you need to get to the core of your grief, by feeling it, to clear it out and to reap the physical benefits of embracing and releasing your grief.

 

3: Grief Is A Gift To Share With The World

 

Tom teaches you that grief is a gift to share with the world, to show you that you can still live your dreams even if you have suffered devastating losses.

 

So many individuals who may have not lost loved ones to death are still grieving other things or people in their lives. You can literally grieve over anything, or anyone.

 

Knowing this, sharing your good grievings, and how you are learning to process and release these energies will inspire other folks to feel their grief.

 

Being a world traveler, we do a terrible job in the Western world with grieving. Many people in Eastern or African cultures refer to Westerners as the Walking Dead. And I ain’t talking about the TV show.

 

We are slowly learning *not* to walk around in a grief-induced, depressive, lower-energy state. We are learning that healing can occur from the inside-out when you let loose, relax, and are present with your feelings. We are leanring that true power and strength is had in feeling pain, crying out fears or just being present with a super shitty day, versus seeking distractions or resisting these feelings in some way, shape or form.

 

Feeling your grief and sharing your stories with the world gives other Westerners and folks from all over the globe permission to feel their pain and fears, so they, too can be the beneficiaries of good grievings.

 

Your Turn

 

Are you feeling your grief?

 

What benefits of grieving have you experienced?

 

About the Author

 

Ryan Biddulph is a blogger, author and world traveler who’s been featured on Richard Branson’s Virgin Blog, Forbes, Fox News, Entrepreneur, Positively Positive, Life Hack, John Chow Dot Com and Neil Patel Dot Com. He has written and self-published 126 bite-sized eBooks on Amazon. Ryan can help you build a successful blog at Blogging From Paradise.

Sensing Spirit 

I believe this is what has been holding me back from writing more.  The fear of what I am about to write about. I shouldn’t say fear because it’s all in my mind. It’s just me holding myself back.  I don’t really care what people think, but when it comes to a sensitive subject like this for some reason I do.  As you know from reading my post about Eddie I have a heightened sense of spirit.  I’m not crazy, I’m not abnormal for being like this, heck everyone has the ability to sense spirit. There maybe some individuals out there right now that are in the same position I’m in and don’t wanna say anything cause they aren’t sure.  Well this post is for you my friend.  Tell someone, it may just help you.

Going back to my story about Eddie and what felt like a conversation with him actually being here. That made me realize that this is real, and that I can feel the presence of spirit.  There are two that are around almost all of the time. One is Eddie who I miss a little more this month since our birthdays were a day after each other. The Second one is my god sister Amanda. Those 2 are the main ones around me all the time. Protecting me and watching over me.  They say there is a “witching hour” between 3-5 am. I can’t tell you how many times I have been awoken between these times. I’m awake now because of work but I would say 5 out of 7 days I wake up between these times.  I do fall back to sleep but it takes time.

This may sound funny but I do talk to them sometimes. Sometimes I just acknowledge that they are around and go about my day. They are close to me now as I write this post. It’s a stronger presence, maybe because I’m finally writing about it, I don’t know.  As I mentioned I did do a reading with a physic medium and was told that I’m not  the type of person who would be able to handle helping others with senseing there loved ones. I was told I wouldn’t be able to handle the emotions.  I disagree with that because I as I stated I feel like I’m here to help others.  I love to comfort others in time of need, even if they aren’t looking for it.  It goes back to that sayingThis  couldn’t be more of the truth.  I never knew the relationship I have with my Cousin (the blogging from paradise guy) would be as strong as it is today. We could go a month without talking, and have a convo as if we just spoke the day before.  I have another friend that I text with almost every day  who was there for me in a time of need when my sister passed.  We could just talk shit to one another that makes no sense but that’s what friends do right. People come and people go in life, but you all know the ones that you can reach out to and will be there, even if it’s been a while that you haven’t spoke.

Back to my story, during my reading I was told specifically to pay attention to my spirit guides. I haven’t been more clear since I started to do this.  I’m a thinker, I think everything happens for a reason, which it does and some of you may not believe this.  I almost always ask my spirit guides a yes or no question about a specific topic that just happened.  Everyone has spirit guides and with my heightend senses maybe it works better for me. If you think I’m a crazy guy then so be it.  This may be helping someone, which is the purpose of this blog anyway.  These are my #goodgrievings. It’s my life and after Eddie passed it has opened me up to a whole new spiritual life I didn’t know I had.   I’m not talking spiritual life like I go to church every week and sing praise.  I’m a normal guy who has a heightened sense of spirit. It’s comforting, knowing that I have watchers….  until next time live, laugh, love goodgrievings 

Cheers,

Tom